SEX AND MARRIAGE
Page 223
Marriage is a union between two people so profound that they virtually
become a new, single person. The work “united” (in older translation, “to
cleave (紧贴)”)
means “to make a binding covenant or contract”. This covenant brings every
aspect of two persons’ lives together. They essentially merge into a single
legal, social and economic unit. They lose much of their independence. In love
they donate themselves, wholly, to the other.
It is the same with the marriage covenant. When you get married, you
make a solemn covenant with your spouse-the Bible calls your spouse your
“covenant” partner (Proverbs 2:17). That day is a great day, and your hearts
are full. But as time goes on, there is a need to rekindle the heart and renew
the commitment. There must be an opportunity to recall all that the other
person means to you and give yourself anew. Sex between a husband and a wife is
the unique way to do that.
Indeed, sex is perhaps the most powerful God-created way to help to
give your entire self to another human being. Sex is God’s appointed way for
two people to reciprocally to one another, “I
belong completely, permanently, and exclusively to you.” You must not use sex
to say anything less.
So, according to the Bible, a covenant is necessary for sex. It creates
a place of security for vulnerability and intimacy. But through a marriage
covenant is necessary for sex, sex is also necessary for the maintenance of the
covenant. It is your covenant renewal service.
Source: The Meaning of Marriage: facing the complexities of commitment with the wisdom of God, by Timothy Keller with Kathy Keller (2011)
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