Saturday, January 2, 2016

The Mark of a Man (1/2)


Page 12
Faith has to be exercised in the midst of ordinary, down-to-earth living. Ordinary living includes trouble. When things are going as we would like, faith doesn’t often seem necessary. It’s when things get messed up that we look around for answers or for help. Where, exactly would you expect the tests for a young man’s faith to come, if not in the three areas where you were having trouble?

Page 15
The world cries for men who are strong: strong in conviction, strong to lead, to stand, to suffer. I pray that you will be that kind of man, Pete, glad that God made you a man, glad to shoulder the burden of manliness in a time when to do so will often bring contempt. I say to you what Paul said in his letter to the Ephesians Christians:

Live life, then, with a due sense of responsibility, not as men who do not know the meaning and purpose of life but as those who do. Make the best use of you time, despite all the difficulties of these days. Don’t be vague but firmly grasp what you know to be the will of the Lord.

Page 47, 48
Four extremely important events illuminate where woman stands in relation to man. I see, in them, who I am as a woman, who you are as a man.

1. She is made for the man. According to the specifications, she was divinely designed to fit his needs exactly – and adapter, a responder.

2. She was made from the man, quite literally, constructed our out of one of his own bones. He was her reason for being, her source, which is one of the root meanings of the New Testament word for “head”. If you miss the point in Genesis 2, you can pick it up in 1 Corinthians 11: “For man was not made from woman but woman from man. Neither was man created woman, but woman for man.”

“Oh, well,” people have said to me, “you’re just interpreting things your way. There are lots of other interpretations.” Are there? Give three examples.

3. She was brought to the man. God made a present of Eve to Adam, not of Adam to Eve. She was his.

4. She was named by the man. The Old Testament authority to name was immense importance. It signified the acceptance of responsibility. He was taking charge (responsible).

Page 54
“God is so masculine,” wrote C.S. Lewis, “that all creation is feminine by comparison.” The earth has always been seen in the human imagination as female: Mother Earth, Mother Nature. The sun is usually thought of as male, often as a god. For the earth receives, is acted upon, and gives back in fertility what is planted, while the sun receives nothing from earth, but shines in his strength upon her, giver her life. Here we have the ancient and deep human consciousness of maleness and femaleness.

Page 55
 The sea is His, He made it. It receives its very being, as well as its daily instructions, from the Creator and Sustainer of the world. God is the initiator. This is the distilled essence of masculinity: initiation. All creation responds to His initiating. It is the only thing creation can do.

Page 58-59
Eve was made to order. God saw the shape of Adam’s need and designed the woman to fit it exactly in every way. She was to be an adapter. When you’re looking for the right woman to marry, Pete, look for one who is prepared to adapt to you. Now don’t suppose for a minute that you yourself won’t have to budge (让步). When two people live together day and night, for life, both of them need to give and take; and I’ll mention more of this later. But if you find a woman who is ready to go where you go and do what you do without brooding about being “her own person,” you’ll have found a treasure. She will have to be a woman who has submitted herself to God, first of all, because otherwise she’ll be listening to the insistent voices around her, telling her that she’s got to be independent and autonomous, that she ought to not to be “only” somebody’s wife or somebody’s mother, that she needs to seek fulfillment for herself, and that can only be found beyond the bounds of home. If, having submitted herself to God, she understands that what He had in mind when He made her was response – in order that both man and woman be fulfilled – she will be at peace with the arrangement.

Page 59
The important thing for you, as a man, to remember, Pete, is that a woman cannot properly be the responder, unless the man is properly the initiator. He must take the lead in order that she may follow, as in a dance. The willingness of each to perform the “steps” that have been choreographed gives the other freedom.

Page 60
If the husband can look upon his gift of initiation as a privilege, instead of as a right; and if the wife can look upon her gift to response in the same way, instead of as an obligation, both might be surprised to find that Jesus’ promise actually comes true for them: The yoke proves to be easy, the burden light.

Page 64
To husband means simply “to take care of”.

Page 71 (Prejudice vs Harmony)
It was not from pure prejudice that God equipped spiders to skitter, lions to spring, and donkeys to plod. It was his concern for a universe that could function together in harmony. The part each was to play in the harmony was determined as carefully as (infinitely more carefully than) the orchestration of a symphony. God did it with generosity; He did it with love; He did it with grace. His gifts to men and women are not, any more that His gifts to lions or spiders, “equal”. They are complementary. They contribute to the harmony of the design. It was grace, the Bible says, which gave those differing gifts. Furthermore, the anatomical difference is very far from irrelevant to the overall plan. It is wholly and wonderfully relevant.

Page 78
What is true in the theater of the home is true also in the other theater, the local church. Christ is the true Head. Men represent His authority in the local body of believers. Women, in subjection to Christ, are subject to the representative authority – not because they’re not competent or worthy, but quite simply because they are enacting a drama. This order stands for something.

Page 81
Don’t be cowed (吓到) by them, Pete. With all my heart I say, don’t be cowed. Stand up to them. Stand true to your calling to be a man. Real woman will always be relieved and grateful when men are willing to be men.

Page 82
Jesus “…did not think to snatch at equality with God.” He was subject. Can any woman think that she has as much right to equality with men as Jesus had with His Father?

Don’t be afraid; don’t be ashamed. Moses was neither. He was simple humble. He knew – and you men must remember – that it was not a matter of “setting himself up”. “In the morning the Lord will show who is his, and who is holy…” There’s a lesson there for all 21st century men. It’s God’s authority that is being questioned. It’s God’s business to deal with those who rebel. “Rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft,” God says. He looks for men who will see it for what it is and, in the face of social ostracism or scorn, will stand strong with Him.

Page 84
The offering up of oneself for the sake of others – this is the price of real authority. It was because Christ “humbled himself” – to the point of dying – that He is now lifted up above all others in heaven or earth. His exaltation required his humiliation. The way up is down.

The power of servanthood. It commands respect. It does not demand it.

Jesus also “took a towel”.

The kind of love described by the Greek word agape is defined by Edward Nason West as “a profound concern for the welfare of another without any desire to control that other, to be thanked by that other, or to enjoy the process.” It gives itself. It lays down its life.

Page 88
Responsibility has been the mark of a man from the moment when God shaped a woman to fit Adam’s need and presented her to him and Adam recognized her and accepted her and named her. Responsibility is the refusal to drift or delay or pass the buck.

Page 91
The husband must give his wife the same sort of love that Christ gave to the Church, when he sacrificed himself for her.

Men ought to give their wives the love they naturally have for their own bodies.

A man shall leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife.

Let every one of you who is husband love his wife as he loves himself…

You husbands should try to understand that the wives you live with, honoring them as physically weaker yet equally heirs with you of the grace of life.

Compare the list of commands to husband with the list for wives:

The wife has no longer full rights over her own person, but shares them with her husband. The woman reflects the person and glory of the man. You wives must learn to adapt yourselves to your husbands, as you submit yourselves to the Lord. The willing subjection of the Church to Christ should be reproduced in the submission of wives to their husband...Let the wife reverence her husband. Their role is to be receptive. Holy women of ancient times trusted in God and were submissive to their husbands.


There you have it: the contrast between what is expected of men and what is expected for women. The roles are complementary, planned to enable husbands and wives to function together without bumping into each other or stepping on each other’s toes, and in such a way as to contribute, rather and deprive, to free, rather than to shackle.

Source: The Mark of a Man: Following Christ's Example of Masculinity by Elisabeth Elliot

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