Holy Matrimony - James and Pastor Yoke Keng 25.08.2012

1) 恩 - 感谢， 感恩
2) 爱 - 牺牲 （婚前常享受爱，婚后常忙于付出）
3) 情 - 时间，陪同 （婚前常享受爱，婚后常忙于付出）
4) 义 - 义不容辞
Shared by Rev Yeo

Believing God for His best - Bill Thrasher 2/2

80

1 Corinthians 3: 21-23

So then let no one boast in men. For all things belong to you, whether Paul or Apollos or Cephas or the world or life or death or things present or things to come; all things belong to you, and you belong to Christ; and Christ belongs to God.

Observe the phrase “all things belong to you.” I spent a year asking God what these words meant. I came to the conclusion that they show the adequacy of God for us in every situation. All you or I will ever need to fulfill His will for your lives He will provide and not one minute later than we need it. Any help from another person, or any provision from the world, any blessing in life or death, any present or future blessing – all of this belongs to Him. These blessings have been given to us in order to serve our wonderful Savior and Master, Jesus Christ, because we belong to Him. We have earned His judgment, but in His grace all things belong to us in Christ.

81-82

In order to experience contentment, we must learn to delight in the Lord and repent of anything that is hindering a flourishing relationship with God. A verse that may seem far away and inapplicable from us is Isaiah 48: 22, which states, “There is no peace for the wicked.”
You say, “Yes, that is right; they do not deserve peace and contentment.” But let me ask you one question, “What is more wicked than telling God that He cannot rule over an area of your life?” To do so is to spurn His great gift of peace and contentment. In the testimony of my own courtship, I related how God convicted me of idolatry. In this case I sensed that God was directing me to end my relationship. In this case it was also resurrected some years later.

What do you do when you long for another person? Remember that it is not a sin to be tempted (Hebrews 4: 15). First of all, you can thank God for your normal desire. It is natural to long for companionship and intimacy. In order to not let his longing take your thoughts in the wrong direction, bring your thoughts in the light to God and share them whit Him. Reaffirm the truth of His knowledge of your needs and desires and of His loving care for you. Be honest in your conversation with Him. Trust Him to fulfill your desire in His righteous ways and perfect timing (John 7: 37-39). In order not to unduly live in the future, ask Him also to make the most of your singleness for His glory. As Jim Elliot said, “Wherever you are, be all there.”

84

As you respond to the Lord in your single years, you are not only giving yourself the best preparation for marriage but also building a spiritual heritage for future generations. Fanny Crosby was given a wrong medical treatment at six weeks of age that resulted in permanent blindness. As a child she made up her mind to store in her heart what she called the “little jewel of contentment.” She declared this jewel to be the “comfort of her life.” When she was eight years old she wrote:

O what a happy soul am I!

Although I cannot see,

I am resolved that in this world

Contented I will be.

How many blessings I enjoy

that other people don’t.

To weep and sigh because I’m blind;

I cannot, and I won’t.

93-94

If only I could look each teenage girl in the eye and tell her, “There are consequences to every moral decision you make; there are repercussions that will follow you the rest of your life and into the next generation!”

How I yearn to look each teenage boy in the eye and tell him, “Be strong. Be a real man. Trust God’s Word, discipline yourself, don’t give in to youthful lust and trade your birthright of godly love for mess of pottage that will turn to ashes in your heart.”

I have learned too late the truth I hear a man of God say: “Love can always wait to give. Lust can never wait to get.”

95-96

After McQuilkin cared for Muriel and watched her suffer from Alzheimer’s for twenty-five years, the Lord took her home on September 20, 2003. As he reflected on what he had learned, he noted that it was painful to love her and know that she was not capable of loving him back. One day he thought, “Lord, is that the way it is between you and me? You pouring out your love and care so consciously, and what do you get back – a brief salute in the morning, we connect, grumbling when I don’t get what I want, when you don’t do it the way I like?” McQuilkin has inspired countess others by his love and faithfulness to his vows.

102

You are blessed if you have friends who can help you assess and develop Christlike character. It also helpful to realize that your present family relationships can set patterns that could affect a marriage. Would you desire to marry a person like yourself? What will you w belike as a marriage partner? The way a young man treats his mother and sister tends to set the tone for how he will treat his future wife. In a similar vein, a young lady’s relationship to her father and brothers can establish set ways of relating to her future husband.

109-110

CS Lewis alluded to these maters when he wrote:

Good and evil both increase at compound interest, that is why the little decisions you and I make every day are of such infinite importance. The smallest good act today is the capture of a strategic point from which, a few months later, you will be able to go on to victories you never dreamed of. An apparent trivial indulgence in lust or anger today is the loss of a ridge or railway line or bridgehead from which the enemy may launch an attack otherwise impossible.

113

I received an encouraging letter in the mail from a formal student named Susan:

I’m now forty-four years old and God has given me great contentment, joy, faith, and knowledge in His love. You once suggested praying for a man with the qualities in Psalm 112. I’ve also added James 3:17-18 to that list! My prayer request to you one semester was for a husband.

Psalm 112

1 Praise the Lord.

Blessed are those who fear the Lord,

    who find great delight in his commands.

2 Their children will be mighty in the land;

    the generation of the upright will be blessed.

3 Wealth and riches are in their houses,

    and their righteousness endures forever.

4 Even in darkness light dawns for the upright,

    for those who are gracious and compassionate and righteous.

5 Good will come to those who are generous and lend freely,

    who conduct their affairs with justice.

6 Surely the righteous will never be shaken;

    they will be remembered forever.

7 They will have no fear of bad news;

    their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord.

8 Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear;

    in the end they will look in triumph on their foes.

9 They have freely scattered their gifts to the poor,

    their righteousness endures forever;

    their horn[c] will be lifted high in honor.

10 The wicked will see and be vexed,

    they will gnash their teeth and waste away;

the longings of the wicked will come to nothing.

James 3

17 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

18 Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.

120

God gave Adam a mission to obey Him, and then He provided a helper in Eve. The provision came fight after the command (Genesis 2: 16-18). The context would indicate that a wife is God’s provision to help a husband to obey Him. The focus of the single years is to discover God’s calling, and then obey Him. If a man needs a wife to fulfill this calling, he can surely believe God to provide one in His timing.

Genesis 2

16 And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden;

17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”

18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

127-128

Satan attacked Eve’s understanding of God’s goodness in the garden and led humanity into sin (Genesis 3: 1-4). Every human faces this scheme of the devil each day of his life. Realize, too, that some of God’s good gifts may come in strange packages. It is not often that you hear someone thanking God for the good gift for loneliness. However, it is often in loneliness that the deepest companionship with God is cultivated. Anything that encourages you to cry out to God can be overruled for good. As long as you seek God, He can put His prospering hand upon you to fulfill His will (2 Chronicles 26: 5).

Source: Believing God for His best: How to marry contentment and singleness by Bill Thrasher (2004)

Believing God for His best - Bill Thrasher 1/2

28-29

In Dr. Olford’s words:

When God explained to Adam what was lacking in his life, he must have acquiesced to God’s will, or else God would never have imposed a woman on his life, for to have done so against Adam’s will would have been an immoral act. God caused a deep sleep to come upon him, and Adam was prepared to rest in the will of God until God awakened him to the right partner. Only while Adam was asleep in the will of God could God create the woman that was suitable for him in every respect.

Then, of course, there was the awakening – God’s consummation of the love, courtship and marriage, as it were. When Adam awakened, the woman that God brought him matched him perfectly. There was an affinity of spirit, soul, body, for they had met in God.

As far as I was concerned, this revolutionized my thinking. Having seen this truth, I decided I was not going to do any kind of exploring to find a wife; I was going to sleep in the will of God. And the amazing thing is that when you sleep in God’s will, He puts a protection around you. Many young women could have broken into my life between the ages of twenty-five and thirty, but they were held off while I did the job God wanted me to do.

43

The spiritual battle in Penny’s mind revolved around the question, What is your way, Lord, of drawing two people together? She had learned the importance of “guarding her heart” (see Proverbs 4:23) and keeping herself not only physically but also mentally and emotionally for one man. The spiritual battle in my mind was What is wrong with me? My mind would be tempted to image being somebody else that could instantly win her heart. My journal is full of entries of disappointment and even jealousy of others who seemed to enjoy more favor from her. It is also full of questions about whether my life could truly make a wife happy.

46

I do not want what is good or even better, but God, give me Your absolute best in all areas of my life.” At that moment the mailman arrived with my letter. The last line of the letter read “May God give you His best in all ways and at all times.”

59-60

Thank You, Lord, for these readers and Your love for them and Your knowledge of their deepest desires and aspirations. Build a wall of protection around them to protect them from the wrong people, and mold them into the beautiful people You designed them to be. In You timing and will, lead them into marriages that are clearly of You. On their wedding days, may there only be tears of joy – not tears of regret and sorrow. May You do something in each of our lives that could bring great rejoicing in heaven for all eternity. At each of our vulnerable moments, send Your heavenly support in our lives. Give us the grace to believe You for Your best, and may You never forget this prayer, but remember it day and night and act upon as each day requires.

May the following chapters be used of You to answer this prayer. For your glory and our eternal benefit. Amen.

64

The unwritten code among us was “attention toward all, but intention toward none.” I was exhorted to “guard my heart with all diligence, for it flows the springs of life” (see Proverbs 4:23). Consequently, we singles fellowshipped in groups, not pairing off. The Lord gave us marvelous times, and we had great freedom to exhort one another to love and good deeds and to serve the Lord together with our strength, devotion, and enthusiasm. In the inner recesses of my heart, I was yearning to do my husband good all the days of my life (Proverbs 31: 12), even before I knew who he was. This transformed me into pursuing the Lord will all my heart while keeping myself for one man only.

75

Waiting is a very important aspect of the Christian life, but it is not easy. It is difficult to wait on God for His provision of a life partner. The gift of perspective is something that God offers to you free of charge, but it was at great expense to Him. The gift of being controlled by His love and delivered from living only for ourselves was purchased by Christ’s sacrificial and substitutionary death.

For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this, that one died for all, therefore all died; and He died for all, so that they who live might no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died and rose again on their behalf. (2 Corinthians 5: 14-15)

It is not wrong to desire marriage, for God created us with needs that He often uses marriage to fulfill. Only as we are able to put these desires in perspective are we able to trust Him with these desires. If we think only of ourselves, it is impossible to trust God in this area. However if we delight in the Lord who has delivered us from living only for ourselves, the question is now, “How do You desire me to use my singleness as I wait on You for Your will and provision of marriage partner?”

76

Many of us can relate to feeling alone when we are at a couple-dominated gathering and are without a companion or life partner. I remember the testimony of very godly single lady who had ministered around the world. She talked about this lonely feeling she experienced each time she attended wedding ceremony. Through continuous prayer, she learned to give that time at the wedding to the Lord and look to Him to deliver her from temptation to feel sorry for herself.

It is a mouthful to say that we need to let God train us to look to Him alone for our ultimate sense of security and significance. Only in this way will our ultimate sense of well-being not be determined by the presence or absence of a mate. Is not a key theme of godly singleness contentment?

77 Definition of contentment

Jeremiah Burroughs, in his work entitled The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment, defines contentment as a “sweet, inward, gracious form of Spirit which freely submits to and delights in God’s wise and fatherly disposal in every condition.”

Source: Believing God for His best: How to marry contentment and singleness by Bill Thrasher (2004)

A man’s guide to the spiritual disciplines - Patrick Morley

23

Is creation good, evil, or neutral?

Then one day, while studying glucose, I was struck with an analogy. Glucose is a three-part compound: C6H12O4 – six parts carbon, twelve parts hydrogen, six parts oxygen. So glucose is full of oxygen, but not only oxygen; it is also full of carbon and hydrogen. In the same way, the earth really is full of God’s glory, despite the fact that it is also full of evil and futility.

The Bible also says, “For everything God created is good” (1 Timothy 4:4). Colossians 1:16 goes even further,

For by (Jesus) all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him.

So the bottom line in Scripture is this: (1) God made everything. (2) Everything God made is good. Therefore, (3) everything is intrinsically good. This implies that nature has meaning and value. This is not to say that nature is incorruptible. Because of the fall we have to explain the stench of polluted rivers, belching smokestacks, and natural disasters. What the Bible does men, however, is that apart from sin, nature is good.

24-26

Does nature hint of, reveal, conceal, or tarnish God?

We can experience creation through our senses – we can see it, smell it, hear it, touch it, taste it. Nature will not necessarily lead us to salvation, but it will reveal God’s grandeur and give us tangible evidence of His invisible qualities. As a spiritual habit, I know of no better way to experience awe than to observe God as the Creator of the heavens and earth. Through general revelation, the window is open.

38

By the end of the fourth century, there were two important church meetings – the Council of Laodicea in 363, and the Council at Carthage in 397. Both gave canonical lists that mirrored what was already accepted in the church. We also know that Athanasius, the bishop in Alexandria, Egypt, had a tradition of writing an Easter letter every year. In this Easter epistle of 367, he acknowledged the twenty-seven books that we have in our New Testament. He testified to their authenticity and authority.

39

Why is Bible study important?

Because belief gives birth to life. Theologians say that Scriptures are given for our justification and sanctification. That basically means the Bible exists to bring us to faith (justification, or salvation), and to help us become more and more like Christ as we grow up in our faith (sanctification, or holiness).

55

C.S. Lewis said,

The two methods by which we are allowed to produce events may be called work and prayer… The kind of causality we exercise by work is, so to speak, divinely guaranteed, and therefore ruthless. By it we are free to do ourselves as much harm as we please. But the kind which we exercise by prayer is not like that; God has left Himself a discretionary power. Had He not done so, prayer would be an activity too dangerous for man…That is why God has retained a discretionary power of granting or refusing it; except on that condition prayer would destroy us.

66

In the Old Testament, the Hebrew word for worship means “to bow down or to prostrate yourself.” In the New Testament, the Greek work for worship means “to kiss, the way a dog licks it s master’s hand.”

75-76

Broadcaster Roy Firestone once interviews a seven-foot tall, 260-pound specimen of pure muscle and athleticism, a man who had lead his team to back-to-back championships and had been named an all-star twelve times and one of the best big man in the history of the National Basketball Association. “Your teammates tell me that every time you hit the hardwood you give 110 percent,” Firestone said. “They say that you’ll go out and practice and shoot hook shots for hours and hours and hours. They tell me that you will run wind sprints until you literally cannot walk anymore. They say that during a scrimmage that you will go for loose balls like it is the NBA finals. Why? You’re one of the best there has ever been in this game. Why don’t you just lie back and take it easy?”

He said, “Roy, you need to know something. When I go out onto the hardwood, I’m not going to work. I’m going to worship. How would I dare to not give back to God what He has given to me with joy and thanksgiving? No, I don’t go work. I go worship.”

His name is Hakeem Olajuwan. He’s a Muslim. He’s not a Christian, and yet God in His providence has given him the insight that our work is meant to be an act of worship.

144

You see, tithing really isn’t about God’s need to receive; it’s about our need to give. Tithing doesn’t earn greater favor with God. Instead tithing gives us the opportunity to express our appreciation to God for His provision to us, and to participate in building His kingdom. What tithing does is to help us to remember that every good thing comes from Him.

Tithing is not a blessing for God, but from God. Tithing, instituted by Abraham, is a way of thanking the One who has blessed us: 90 percent for temporal life, 10 percent (or more) for spiritual life. A faithful steward isn’t some miserly person who counts out 10 percent to drop in the offering plate Sunday after Sunday. A faithful steward devotes 100 percent of this time, talent, and treasure to God’s glory. 

Source: A man’s guide to the spiritual disciplines: 12 habits to strengthen your walk with Christ - Patrick Morley (2007)

How The Mighty Fall - Jim Collins 3/3

Stage 1 (27-44)

Hubris born of success

- Success entitlement, arrogance

- Neglect of a primary flywheel

- “What” replaces “Why”

- Decline in learning orientation

- Discounting the role of luck

Stage 2 (45-64)

Undisciplined pursuit of more

- Unsustainable quest for growth, confusing big with great

- Undisciplined discontinuous leaps
- Declining proportion of right people in key seats

- Easy cash erodes cost discipline

- Bureaucracy subverts discipline

- Problematic succession of power

Stage 3 (65-82)

Denial of risk and peril

- Amplify the positive, discount the negative

- Big bets and bold goals without empirical validation

- Incurring huge downside risk based on ambiguous data

- Erosion of healthy team dynamics

- Externalizing blame

- Obsessive reorganizations

Stage 4 (83-101)

Grasping for salvation

- A series of silver billets

- Grasping for a leader-as-as savior

- Panic and haste

- Radical change and “revolution” with fanfare

- Hype precedes results

- Initial upswing followed by disappointments

- Confusion and cynicism

- Chronic restructuring and erosion of financial strength

Stage 5 (103-123)

Capitulation to irrelevance or death

Source: How The Mighty Fall & Why Some Companies Never Give In - Jim Collins (2009)